To Make Good Decisions, Don’t Use A Pros And Cons List

Updated Feb 1, 2023, 08:37am EST

It’s a New Year, which means a set of new resolutions and a promise to finally make decisions about the tough calls you face in your career. To do that, you’re probably scribbling out a bunch of can’t-fail goals and lists of pros and cons about whether or not to take a leap to a new job or quit and start that business you’ve always considered.

Don’t.

Decision-making expert Annie Duke says goals and resolutions need a way out or an “unless,” and that a pros and con list is a “bias amplifier;” one that allows you to game which option looks best when making the list and weight different factors similarly even when they’re not. A toxic boss, say, should carry a lot more weight than whether or not your current job gives you access to on-site brew taps.

“Once we start to think about something, we’ve usually already made a decision. So if you want to do it, you’ll have lots of pros, and if you don’t want to do it, you’ll have lots of cons,” said Duke, the author of Quit: The Power of Knowing When To Walk Away and a former professional poker player who is a “special partner” focused on decision science at venture fund First Round Capital Partners.

“The other problem is that [pro and cons lists] don’t really express magnitude. How bad is the thing, or how good is the thing?”

The Problem With Pro And Con Lists
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Duke spoke with Forbes last month for a subscriber-only session where she talked about using helpful decision frameworks, getting a “quitting coach” for sticking to your commitments and developing “kill criteria” to look for factors that could help you know if a decision is right or it’s time to quit.

“What you want to think about is: What are the things that I value? How much do I value time? How much do I value money? How much do I value fulfillment at work?” said Duke. “Then you have to make a forecast, essentially: Ask [yourself] which thing is going to cause me to achieve the things that I value at a cost that I’m willing to bear.”

Rather than a pros and cons list, Duke suggested people make that forecast by imagining, say, how you think you’ll feel a year from now. “Where are you happier? I think that’s really the better way to think about things. You’re just going to fool yourself with a pros and cons list that you’ve somehow uncovered some sort of truth. Mostly what you’re going to have uncovered is your own bias.”

When trying to make decisions about change, people are typically biased against the switch, she says, due to the concept of loss aversion. “We’re very tolerant of those losses from the status quo, so we have to recognize that and we have to step back and think about that as a new decision,” Duke said. “One of the best ways to do that is to project forward.”

A Framework For Decisions
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After making that projection, Duke suggests developing “kill criteria”—asking yourself what wouldn’t make you ok to remain in the situation, and the signals that would tell you it’s time to leave—as well as getting a “quitting coach” to help plan your exit. It “could be a mentor, it could be a colleague, it could be a friend, it could be a therapist—somebody who has your long-term best interest at heart.”

Duke also had recommendations for people setting goals or making New Year’s resolutions for the year ahead. All too often, people fall prey to a cognitive phenomenon that behavioral economist Richard Thaler has spoken eloquently about, Duke said. People do not like to “close mental accounts in the losses,” she says, or stop before some kind of endpoint we’re trying to reach.

“We have a loss on paper. And if we ‘closed the account’—in other words, we stop running or we sell the stock or we quit our job, whatever it might be—then we now have to take that loss on paper and turn it into a realized loss.”

She says that cognitive phenomenon “causes goals to be very pass-fail in nature.” If you’re running a marathon and you hurt yourself on mile 13, you feel like you failed if don’t get to mile 26, even if a half marathon would have been an achievement. If you’re climbing Mt. Everest and get 300 feet from the summit but have to turn back for weather, you may feel like you failed even though getting that far is impressive. “That's part of the reason why lots of people have died up there, because they've continued up toward the summit in conditions under which they shouldn't. They don't want to close mental accounts in the losses,” she says.

Deciding When To Quit
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Instead, when you set goals or resolutions, make sure you include the word “unless.” I will finish this marathon unless I get injured. I will get that promotion unless my boss expects me to do things that aren’t ethical. “I think we have the intuition that if you have a backup plan, you won't try as hard. But that's not true. ... It's not like you're just going to go quit willy-nilly because we're not really wired that way. That's the thing that we have to remember: We're still going to want to achieve it. It's just going to stop us from achieving it when we have a broken leg.”

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Jena McGregor is a Forbes senior editor who covers the future of work, leadership strategy, workplace trends and careers. She joined Forbes in October 2021 and is based in Atlanta. She’s covered

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London: Holding Court Or Losing Ground As A Family Office Hub?

Walk down the streets of Mayfair and you’ll hear the soft hum of discreet conversations-the kinds that birth fortunes, seal family legacies, or upend empires. It’s a place where history breathes life into modern finance and London’s corridors have long resonated with whispered deals. The city’s storied reputation as a crossroads of global commerce is well-earned, but its allure for family offices—those private wealth entities tasked with safeguarding the fortunes of the world’s ultra-wealthy—runs deeper than its cobblestone streets and renowned clubs.

Dubbed “the world’s coffee house” by the Lord Mayor Alderman Michael Mainelli, London owes much of its cachet to convening disparate actors—investors, fund managers, and advisors—in one place, under an air of civility that has withstood centuries. Family offices are drawn by the capital’s pedigree and by the strength of its networks, institutions, and this promise: a world in one city, where connections are as prized as the billions they manage.

Yet as London navigates the pressures of geopolitical shifts, from Brexit to tax reforms, its role as a family office haven faces scrutiny. Can it retain its coffee house moniker in a time when private wealth is becoming more mobile and less tied to tradition?

Membership Clubs and the Concepts That Power Them

At the heart of London’s appeal to family offices is its network of people and the exclusive members’ clubs they frequent. Mayfair is their epicenter, a constellation of private spaces where legacy and discretion converge. The Connaught, the Arts Club, and White’s are more than just havens of plush armchairs and impeccable service; they’re where deals are made, confidences exchanged, and wealth quietly reshaped. Alongside them the newer players such as 5 Hertford Street and Maison Estelle have built on the world that Soho House started, by opening up to more of the creative classes. These new spaces are where old money meets new ideas, creating a potent mix that sustains London’s position as a nexus for the ultra-wealthy.

What sets these spaces apart is not just their exclusivity, but the culture of trust they foster. Central to this is the Chatham House Rule, a protocol that ensures participants in a discussion can share insights freely without fear of attribution. The concept, named after the London headquarters of the Royal Institute of International Affairs where the rule originated in June 1927, has become a cornerstone in an industry built on discretion and long-term relationships. It enables the candid exchange of ideas about investment strategies, succession planning, and governance—conversations that, elsewhere, might be constrained by caution or competition.

London’s Geographic and Structural Advantages

London’s geographic centrality is more than a convenience; it’s a centrepiece of its success. Positioned in a time zone that links Asia, Europe, and the Americas, London is ideally placed for global markets. For family offices with diverse portfolios, this accessibility is invaluable, allowing them to act swiftly across continents.

But geography is just the beginning. London’s legal system, rooted in English common law, offers a framework that is as robust as it is influential. Contracts governed by English law are seen as gold-standard worldwide, providing clarity and enforceability across jurisdictions. Indictments obtained in London carry global weight, reinforcing its reputation as a reliable arbiter of financial disputes. For family offices, this legal strength translates to confidence, whether they’re structuring trusts, litigating disputes, or navigating complex regulatory landscapes.

Add to this the depth of professional services available in the city. From tax advisors to investment consultants, London hosts a veritable army of who understand the intricacies of managing private wealth. It is this ecosystem—one that blends world-class legal, financial, and advisory expertise—that continues to make London irresistible to family offices, even as geopolitical winds shift.

Challenges to London’s Status

Still, the city is not without its challenges. The Brexit referendum in 2016 began a redefinition of London’s place in the global financial hierarchy. Once Europe’s indisputable gateway, London now competes with Frankfurt, Paris, and even Dublin for European market access. Family offices that once viewed London as their European hub now question its ability to remain a central node.

Compounding these pressures are the UK’s evolving tax policies. Recent changes to the taxation of non-domiciled residents have sent ripples through the family office community. For decades, the non-dom regime attracted global elites to London, offering significant tax advantages. But as these rules tighten, murmurs of capital outflows grow louder. London’s historic allure may not be enough to hold these mobile fortunes in place.

The broader economic uncertainty in the UK also plays a role. Stagnating growth, shifting fiscal policies, and competition from other financial centres—Dubai, Singapore, New York—mean that London can no longer take its dominance for granted. It must continually reinvent itself to remain relevant.

Resilience and the Road Ahead

If history has taught us anything, it’s that London is nothing if not resilient. Amid wars, financial crises, and political upheavals, the city has consistently adapted and thrived. Its ability to evolve has always been its greatest strength, and family offices are betting that this will remain true.

The path forward, however, requires a delicate balancing act. On one hand, London must preserve the elements that have always made it unique: its rich history, its cultural pull, and its network of institutions. On the other, it must embrace change, whether that’s integrating cutting-edge technology to strengthen risk management, or recalibrating its tax and regulatory regimes to attract global wealth.

Family offices, too, are changing. With growing awareness of cybersecurity threats and increasing scrutiny of environmental, social, and governance (ESG) principles, they are becoming more sophisticated in how they manage risks and allocate capital. London must position itself as the place where these evolving needs can be met—offering not just tradition but innovation.

In the end, the story of London and family offices is one of mutual dependency. As the city fights to retain its status as a global hub, family offices will continue to find value in its networks, its services, and its enduring mystique. The world’s coffee house is still open for business—but it will need to keep brewing fresh ideas to stay relevant.

P.S. Simple has carved out specific, regional information for the world of family offices. Visit this link to stay abreast of knowledge and data related to the UK.

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I help design and incubate the family offices of the future through Simple, a family office insight & strategy company that empowers

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